Pretending to Paint Take 2

This is stemming from a post a year or so ago when I began teaching myself to paint.

Did a couple more paintings for my darling friend Mandee who was recently married!
Congratulations Amanda Carolyn!

The first is an inside joke from an amazing Italian restaurant in Georgia. Nothing special, just some wall decor.

The second is from a gorgeous hiking trail in Idaho! Still determined to get out there and visit them in Idaho.

All the colors!

This is the first time I have been satisfied with mountains!

Aaannnnd adding light...

Trees and Terrain!

Making the wood look like wood and the beginnings of shadowing

And there they are together! Inside joke and landscape. Hoozah!

Really had a blast doing these- mostly because they meant my friend was marrying the love of her life and I was getting to do things for her. :) These are happy times.

Hope you enjoyed!

Storming the Walls of Freedom

What does it feel like to be completely free?
To be completely unhindered by perceptions and opinions and the right way of doing things and the right way of thinking and the right way of feeling?

Jesus.

Here's the thing for me having seen the heart of God and having said yes to Him- I live in a paradox.

Because Freedom has been placed at my feet freely, but I still have to take it up in hand, and march forth with it. Freedom is available to me in an instant, but I also have to confront everything that goes against it with force. Freedom is a battle field.

The incredible thing is that Freedom really is available! That is not just a hopeful daydream or a utopian concept; Freedom is at hand! But Freedom is also a choice. I can just as easily cage myself, and live in fear of perceptions and status quo. Or I can break out of that into freedom, and actually start offering myself and everyone around me what we have craved for so long- Freedom to be loved to death and freedom to love to death. Regardless of perception. [Insert Gospel Here]

I think when I finally allow myself to be wholly free, I will meet more opposition than I have ever met in my life. I know it, because Jesus was pretty blunt about that. In this world, I will have trouble. And do not be surprised, because thus were the prophets before us treated.

But the freedom comes in that the opposition is all external. We are no longer living under internal oppression.

"This is the judgment- that light has come into the world, but people loved darkness more than light."
- John 3:18

"Thus said the Lord your God: in repentance and rest is your salvation; in quietness and trust your strength. But you would have none of it."
- Isaiah 30:15

At my core, I refuse to love darkness more than light. And I refuse to miss out on repentance, rest, quietness, and trust. I am saved. And I am strong!

PTL

Bravery at its Finest

August 28, 2013: It was a day of adventure. It was a day of facing fears. It was a day... of victory!

I should have known, when coming home to THIS in my mailbox, that I was in route to an evening of crazy.

And thus begins my tale of bravery.

It was supposed to be a normal Wednesday evening, with nothing more than farm chores and vacuuming.

ALAS, twas not but two strokes of my trusted vacuum when, what to my wandering eyes should appear, but a small slithering tail from under the curtains (insert word that rhymes with appear. I personally would go with the approximate rhyme of 'fear!!!!').

Now given- praise the Lamb- this snake was tiny. Nonetheless, let's just put this at the TOP of the list entitled "Top 5 things NOT allowed in my house."

And so began my efforts of extracting the un-welcomed visitor. Clearly, my previous methods of shot gun or shovel slamming would not be appropriate. These are not, after all, my wooden floors. I prefer to return them hole-less and gash-less.

The obvious first response was... I need a giant pot. And a stick.

And then I looked at my round pot and my flat floor, and thought: "how in the WORLD am I going to get this snake into my pot?"

And then, praise the Lamb, my brain wandered to the thought that should have come first: gloves. Kelli, you need gloves. Work gloves. Leather gloves.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen... I was going after the snake... with my hands.

"And these signs will accompany those who believe: in my name they will cast out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up serpents with their hands..." -Mark 16

And so, I took a minute to psych myself up with this verse... I literally threw my hands into the air, and worshiped the Lord Almighty who has rightfully given us this authority! Because snakes need to die. Or at minimum, be extracted from one's home. :) And so, once I (joyfully) confirmed that the snake was still behind the curtain, and I was not going to have to crawl on my hands and knees looking for it behind the couch... I went in after it.

TRIUMPH!!!

VICTORY, I tell you!

And so I released our little friend back into the wild, where he belongs.

And I sat down to a celebratory beverage to re-read my note. :) CHEERS!

Special shout out to my darling, sweet, and apparently prophetic friend, Jess. You win for motivational speech of the night.

Happy Happenings

Today was so full of happiness.

Started off the day with a wonderful Saturday drive with wonderful Saturday tunes (courtesy of a dear friend and her mad mixed-cd skills).

Then met darling Elise, where I caught up on her life, and got wrecked on the topic of worship. Spent a good deal thinking about worship and worship leading on the way home because of her. Welcomed and needed.

Afterwards, I met the incredible Jess, who kidnapped me to the least mediocre spot in Georgia. We were concerned she was over-selling it. After arrival, she was scorned for her under-selling. Incredible get-away, even better company.

And then the big moment of the night. Birthday party turned ANNOUNCEMENT party! My sister is pregnant! I'm going to be an aunt!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! So very excited. And blessed. Hope everyone had a day as blessed and dear as mine was today. Although I think there are limited ways for that to have been possible. :)

Social Media Nightmare

Oh no. Someone please, please, please delete all my social media accounts the instant I have a child.

I had no idea how little self control I would have. That is, until this afternoon... when to my delight, we discovered my absolute favorite goat (Buttons) had her twins!

Look at them! LOOK AT THEM!!!

Ahhhhh I'm dying inside like a giddy, proud parent. And they're goats. And I've only been the proud owner of Buttons for a month. And I love them. And they're not even my kids.

I just want everyone to see them and aww at them and love them.

So please, oh please, for the sake of my friends/acquaintances' sanity... strictly enforce a social-media ban for Kelli when e'er she has children. Because the world just does not need to see a million pictures of my amazing children.

No, Kelli... it doesn't. :)

Congratulations, Buttons!

Leaving the 99

I want someone to write a book called Leaving the 99. 

The more scripture you read, and the closer you get to Jesus, the more you realize how he aches for every single person he has created. He adores them; he smiles at the thought of them. At the thought of the one. 

Athens has been named a "launching pad". Being a college town, it's no wonder that people come and go constantly. But it's more than that- this beautiful little town in the heart of college shenanigans, is also swarming with missionaries. I'm talking a full-on infestation of people longing for people to know the King. Time and time again I've watched people grow increasingly antsy at staying still. They have an itch in them that lingers until they go. God be praised. If you are ever in a setting of people who genuinely love the Lord, you will instantly know them. They are the yelpers of the group- the ones who have an unfiltered squeal of excitement when someone gives word that a friend who had been searching for something more has encountered God, fallen in love with him, and chosen to devote their life to him. Truly, though. Keep your ears pealed the next time you are in a setting where someone shares that a loved one has encountered Jesus- the ones who let out a burst of excitement at that very moment- they are the ones who long for the 1. They would leave the 99. 

So what is my part in the story? I am a sender. I, of course, am also called to go, and I welcome and urge any of you to argue with me any time that I consider myself not called to go! But at heart, I am a sender. My passion is to find those with that itch to go, and to help them and serve them in any way the Lord sees fit. To encourage their hearts, to steady them in the rock that has become the corner stone, and to be by their side when they are on the field. To convince them that they are not forgotten, that their cause is worthy, and that the work is the Lord's. To be a sounding ground in their troubles, and a delighter in their triumphs. To God be the glory.

And that is why I want someone else to write the book. Leaving the 99. 

Because I don't think, for these, that it is the going that is hard. It is the leaving. Show them the one, and they are running! But it is the 99 that cause their hearts anguish. It is leaving those that have surrounded them and grown them. Leaving the ones who understand, whose hearts have beat in time with theirs. Leaving their families. Leaving their friends. 

Even Jesus went through this. He told his disciples that he must leave and go to Jerusalem and suffer many things and be killed. Peter (arguably his best friend) took him aside, with the loving nature of a friend, and said "Never Lord! This shall never happen to you!" Jesus hears the heart cry of his beloved friend, and it moves him so much that he has to proclaim "Get behind me Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God but merely human concerns" (Matthew 16). 

As a sender- how do I help in this manner? How do I help those called to go be willing to leave the 99? There is such cause for pain therein. Thus, I am so aware that this work is probably the most up to the Lord of any. To keep their eyes fixed on the road ahead of them.

"Jesus replied, 'No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.'" -Luke 9:62.

I don't think He is being harsh when He says this. I think He is being realistic. Because He knows from experience. He left his Father and the kingdom of heaven to be bound eternally to flesh and blood- forsaking all else for the ones who would respond to his love and receive him. To look back is death. To look ahead is to find life. 

And so, you with hearts for the nations- you with hearts for the one. Tell me what is your motivation to leave the 99? Tell me about the 1. Tell me your passion! Lord it feels like you say in Revelation: "Let the reader understand." Because there is something deeper here that brings life like we have never known it. 

God bless to all those who have gone, are going, and will go some day. Passion, Patience, and Peace be with you all in the Name of our Lord. 

Ridiculous

Husband: "You're ridiculous!"
Me: "You love me!"
Husband: "I do! Even though you're ridiculous!"

And this is the gospel. Said by my earthly husband, in mirror to my Husband to be.

Glory, hallelujah, amen. :)

When Good Intentions Yield Bad Fruit

So here's a lesson to bring freedom!
 

I have suffered myself much pain the past handful of years over things that I meant to be good, but had terrible yield. Close friendships that I watched fearfully or tearfully crumble before my eyes, and everything I did seemed to make it worse. I felt so rejected. And we all know how much rejection has good yield........... :) (oops!) It truly took a toll on my emotions, how I viewed myself, and how I viewed people around me. Leave it to the Lord, though, to help save me through marriage. 

A few weeks ago my wonderful husband and I were driving along, having a delightful little road trip back home. When much to my surprise, he started getting particularly irritated at a car driving tens of miles under the speed limit [not really surprised at all- it is a strong person indeed who can suffer such torture without becoming irate!]. Nonetheless, seeing my husband flustered, and wanting him to be at peace, I set about trying to cheer him up. Apparently my version of helping was the same as putting out a fire by throwing cans of hair spray on it. Once more, and yet again, my helping made things worse. "I will not attempt to convey the depth of [my] despair." (See Pride and Prejudice). Truly, though, I was extremely hurt by it. How can it be that when I was trying to help, I was made the enemy?! I will not allow anyone at this point to think wrongly of my husband, because in truth, he was not at fault! And that, my friends, is the lesson of freedom the Lord is teaching me. 

Sometimes the way we love, or the way we want to help, does no good at all! And when we see that, and yet continue attempting to help in the same way we have been helping (hurting), it becomes the moment we stop loving. 

Take Peter... darling, darling Peter. :) Poor bloke! How many times do his good intentions get denied by his very love, Jesus?! He tries to tell Jesus he will not allow him to be killed, and Jesus says "get behind me Satan!" [one of my personal favorite revelations- ask later if interested.] Later, a mob comes to take Jesus captive, Peter draws his sword to defend Him, and Jesus rebukes him. I'll be honest, I would be on the ground sobbing if I were Peter. haha. Still learning the art of criticism here, people. :) 

But here's the ticket: Peter can take it, because he has the humility to receive the correction rather than taking in swells of self-pity. Self-pity will kill you! Humility will save you. And believe it or not, humility involves not beating yourself up over something. Take Judas vs. Peter. Judas hung himself, whereas Peter faced Jesus even in his sorrow, and became the rock on which the church was built. 

And this is how the Lord is saving me these days. Healing me. Instead of soaking myself in confusion and hurt because my good intentions were rejected, realize that my good intentions were not yielding good fruit! And that's ok! There's nothing wrong with the people who couldn't receive love in the way I tried to give it. Sometimes we need to spend less time feeling hurt, and more time figuring out how to love the person in the way they need to be loved. And if there's one thing you learn in marriage, it's that half the time, the best way to help is to keep your mouth shut! :) Honestly, though: love the way that will help. That's my lesson! And it's making me happy.

And to complete the healing process, there is this:

"And when those who were around him saw what would follow, they said, 'Lord, shall we strike with the sword?' And Simon Peter struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. The servant's name was Malchus. But Jesus said, 'No more of this!' And he touched his ear and healed him." (combination of Luke 22:49-51 and John 18:10-11) Jesus heals where I wound. And thus I am free!